Drop some people

Today I decided something. I decided that some people are simply just bad for us. We can try to sugar coat them and try to see their good sides but the truth is that, in this world, some people will always have more of a negative impact on us than positive. They may have a positive influence on you but the negative outweighs it. 

If you are anything like me, you’ll probably still be holding out for them, searching for that one reason why you shouldn’t drop them just yet or why you should hold on to them for a little bit longer. Unfortunately, I’m not going to encourage you to hold on to them or find that good in them today.

As a Nigerian rapper (Modenine) once said, “let it go bruv” or rather, let them go. There are some people that make me feel so terrible after a single conversation. Some people make you feel like the worst person alive after a few moments with them. Why do you continue to stay around them? Why do we keep talking to them even after we promised ourselves never to speak to them again after the last conversation?

Its simple. You haven’t told your mind to drop them. Your heart tells you this person is not good for you but your head tells you, you still need something from them. Now let me tell you another truth. Nobody on this earth is indispensable. Absolutely no one.

I had a friend like that in London. I hated conversations with her but always yearned for the same conversations whenever I wasn’t talking to her. She was so negative and rarely saw the good in anything, the opposite of me but she was my friend so I kept her. When I came to Lagos last year, I physically couldn’t keep up with our conversations and I was so busy socialising with all my cousins that were home for summer, I barely spoke to her.

To cut a long story short, she came to Lagos for Christmas and despite my anticipation to see my beloved friend again, it wasn’t quite the same. Of course it wasn’t the same! My head finally got the message my heart had known for so long. I literally had to leave London for my head to catch the message but the moment my head got it, it was surprisingly very easy.

No matter how good you are or positive you are, there are some people you need to drop. You know it but the head refuses to get the message. You need to make your head get that message and quickly too! You must. For your sanity and for your stability.

As Will Smith nicely put it,

"Stop letting people who do so little for you control so much of your mind, feelings and emotions,"

With all my love,

Dara Rhodes.